I don’t even want to waste your time
Lets just say that maybe
You could help to ease my mind
Baby I aint Mr. Right.
But if you’re looking for fast love.
Fast Love, how far do I have to get up, to get down?
I love meeting people, their vulnerable quirks, their first, their second impressions and all their unedited shades in between.
How far do I have to get up?
I shiver in the chase of old-fashioned good manners.
I get up and introduce myself to a great smile, I get up to be present in my life without uploading my stats online. Without expectation I welcome the unknown.
In the past, love found me when I wasn’t looking.
I don’t date online; like fast food it has it’s moments but it’s not something you want to eat every day for happy ever after.
Like fast food, dial and deliver, online dating has a place in our lives. Fast, immediate, convenient, dialled when the cupboards are bare.
I have friends and family who love online dating and who have had great success and spectacular failures – it’s just not for me.
Online dating is too public, a girlfriend called me with an online dating link to my ex-husband. My ex’s profile photo was one we had photographed overseas together – on our pre-wedding honeymoon. The edited version was cropped to exclude me – it was a great photo.
How far do I have to get up to get down?
I am confused by the need to maintain a dating profile, I prefer to be still and have found I make better decisions when I am in this state.
“I try to stay in a constant state of confusion just because of the expression it leaves on my face.”
FAST LOVE – OPTION 3
1.EXT. CAFÉ – MORNING
Simmon, athletic, in her 40’s is seated at a table ducked behind an upside down newspaper. Amy in her early 40’s, approaches swings a custard croissant and rubs the rock on her engagement finger.
Hey, I thought that was you behind that upside down newspaper. Are you here alone?
SIMMON (Option 1)
Smile and wave like the penguins on Madagascar.
SIMMON (Option 2)
No, here alone, dating myself. My next great love is on his way.
You are too funny … but god, you must be missing it?
2.EXT.STREET – MORNING
Whirring roar of a helicopter landing
Chairs and tables fly past the café as a Helicopter lands on the street. Cars and pedestrians stand still in shock.
The helicopter door swings open and three cloaked men jump onto the street. They remove their hoods and Liam Hemsworth or an incredible single, available look alike and Johnny Depp saunter into the café.
3.INT.CAFE – MORNING
Liam and Johnny stride across to Simmon’s table. Behind them Amy sits on top of her custard croissant in shock.
JOHNNY AND LIAM
A loud explosion shatters the café window behind them. Standing in the rubble a small man who looks nothing like his online dating profile, shuffles forward. He clears his throat and wipes his nose with his sleeve. He inspects what his nose has left on his sleeve and approaches Simmon.
Hi do you know where I can find Simmon. I am her perfect match.
Yikes, Is there an Option 3?
Quotes and images with thanks from Pinterest